The new book by Carl Ostrander
For three decades, when Linda asked how work was, Carl said the same three words: "Fine. Quiet. Nothing happened." This is what really happened.
"The hardest part wasn't the fights. It was going home every night and pretending I'd been somewhere else."
Read the opening
No sign-up. This is how the book begins.
The last count I ever stood for was at four o'clock in the afternoon on a Friday in June of 2021. It was hot. The fans in the cellhouse were pushing the same tired air from one end of the gallery to the other, the way they had every summer for as long as I had worked there. A radio was playing somewhere above me. Somebody was arguing about a basketball game.
Normal. All of it was normal.
I walked the gallery with my clipboard the way I had done it thousands of times. You look at every man. Not at the shape under the blanket. Not at the shoes by the bunk. At the man. You see skin, you see breathing, you see him. That was the first rule anybody ever taught me, and in thirty-one years it never once stopped being true.
When the numbers matched, I called them in. The voice on the radio said, "Count clear." Two words. I had heard them more times than I had heard my own name.
Then I walked down to the sergeant's desk, unclipped the key ring from my belt, and set it on the counter.
It's a strange thing, putting those keys down. For thirty-one years they had been part of my body. When you carry keys in a prison, you never really set them down. Not at lunch, not in the bathroom, not anywhere.
My wife, Linda, had asked me that morning what I was going to feel. I told her I'd probably feel nothing. I'd been telling her that for three decades, every time she asked how work was. "Fine. Quiet. Nothing happened."
That was the biggest lie I ever told, and I told it every day.
Something always happened. Most of it was small. A look on the yard. A tray that came back from a cell with the food still on it. A man who stopped talking to his
The next 124 pages are waiting.
Keep reading · $9.99Inside the book
28 chapters. Each one is a single story from the galleries, and each one ends with the rule Carl took from it. Here are six of them. The endings are in the book.
His first count came up one man short. The blanket in the last cell moved every time he said the name. It moved wrong.
For two months an inmate did him small favors and asked about his pregnant wife. Then he asked for one tiny thing.
Nine pages, six weeks of writing, to a daughter who had thrown away every letter for sixteen years.
Locked up since 1961. He taught every new inmate the same five rules, and never once asked Carl for a thing.
A good guard, a friend, the last name anyone would have guessed. It started with mailing one letter.
A storm knocks out the power in a cellhouse full of men who have nothing but time. What happened next surprised him.
Table of contents
The Count Time Rules
Every chapter ends with one. Here are the first five.
Look at the man, not the shape under the blanket. That goes for everybody in your life.
The people who study you the hardest are the ones with the most time on their hands. Don't confuse patience with peace.
Don't give your word if you can't keep it. People forgive almost anything except a broken promise.
When the numbers don't add up, don't assume the board is wrong. Go back and look again.
When someone builds you up for weeks and then asks for something small, the small thing is never the point. The yes is the point.
From Carl's YouTube channel
Real comments left under Carl's videos, which have been watched more than 75,000 times. Reviews of the book will appear here after launch.
"Thanks for presenting this from an informed viewpoint. The juxtaposition you offer between the guys who were on the other side of the fence making videos is genuinely educational. Thanks for your service and empathy."
"Sir, you have some very interesting experiences, thank you for sharing. I am 75 years of age, and have never been jailed or imprisoned, and the stories you share are terrifying."
"Before I became a State Trooper, I worked at a women's prison… I treated everyone fair and was firm. Anyway, your video is on point."
"I work for the department of corrections… Medium and maximum and close facilities. It's all true, or they toss string to get contraband from another cell to cell."
"We don't realize what's right there potentially just a few footsteps away. Keep opening eyes."
"I am pleased to watch a video about this; I do not want to learn about this first hand."
Look inside
Who it's for
About the author
Carl walked through the gate at Joliet in August 1990, twenty-three years old, in a uniform that still had the fold lines in it. He spent twelve years inside those limestone walls until the old prison closed in 2002, then nineteen more at Stateville, much of it in the famous roundhouse. He retired as a sergeant in 2021.
Today he lives in a small town in Illinois with Linda, still wakes up at 4:30 every morning, and talks about what he learned on his YouTube channel.
"Kow gave me his notebook on his last day. I still have it. This book is my notebook. I'm giving it to you."
Get your copy
What I Saw in 31 Years Behind the Wall
Less than a movie ticket for 31 years of stories. On December 1 it goes to $14.99.
Also by Carl
Want the rules without the stories? Carl's short, practical guide to reading people, spotting a hustle and keeping your home safe.
See The Guard's RulesQuestions
Right after checkout you get a download link on screen and by email. It's a PDF, so it opens on any phone, tablet or computer. You can also print it.
It's a story. Carl's 31 years, from his first day at Joliet to his last count at Stateville, told one chapter at a time. Each chapter ends with a short rule he took from it. If you want a practical guide, that's The Guard's Rules.
It's written for adults and it doesn't hide what prison is: fights, contraband, loss. But there's no gore and nothing is there for shock. It's about people.
125 pages: a prologue, 28 chapters, an epilogue, the 29 Count Time Rules and a short glossary. It reads in two or three evenings.
Names and identifying details of all people in the book have been changed.
Email within 14 days of your purchase and you'll get a full refund. No questions asked.
Yes. $9.99 is the launch price until November 30. After that the book will be $14.99.
P.S.
Every chapter ends with a rule. One of them, from an old man who had been locked up since 1961, is the best piece of advice I ever got. It's a handful of short sentences, it's in Chapter 12, and I've lived by it ever since.
It's $9.99 until November 30. Then it's $14.99. Read it tonight.
Get Count Time · $9.99Count clear.
— Carl